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musical training. You can certainly state your desires and conditions, but you will
be unable to practice the piano, violin, accordion, guitar, etc., for your child.
Let’s forget the “irresponsible” children for a moment and talk about the “dream
children.” Having shown a child the proper way of getting their homework ready and
independently gathering his things into a backpack, we parents, due to his wonderful
personality, remove such responsibility from our shoulders. The “responsible” child
receives deep moral satisfaction from the fact that he’s learned everything and he
is prepared for the lessons of musical training. Even if it seems to you that he
plays the music piece or etude perfectly well, he repeats them again and again just
to be convinced that everything is all right. Such child likes to feel that “everything
is under control,” and his main favourite is his teacher of music, or, to be exact
– his praise. Even his own parents, in terms of the education authority, recede into
Such children often do not have strongly pronounced musical abilities, but they amaze
everyone with their diligence and patience. The parents of “capable but lazy” children
envy the working capacity of your child, saying, “If only my child could be so goal-oriented!
He would have moved mountains!”
One day your child’s persistence shows good results. From the “ugly duckling” he
gradually turns into a black swan, about to surpass other children with whom he started
to take musical training. His uncontrollable eagerness to play music becomes stronger
It would seem that the parents should be happy and pleased that they have such a
responsible child. But I want to warn you about some cases when such “responsibility”
can not just advance, but on the contrary, impede and even harm your child’s progress.
If you are lucky enough to get a great music teacher who is familiar and capable
of working with such a child, all you have to do is praise, encourage and support
the small workaholic.
But what happens if your music teacher isn’t able to notice your child’s hard work
and diligence? As a good musician and simply a good person, he may have never dealt
with children like that. Seeing the student’s diligence, the teacher constantly increases
his work load more and more, being sure that the child is capable of doing it. And
it really works for some time. But there comes a moment when the small musician,
continuing to work hard at the musical training, can not perform any music piece
without making mistakes. On the contrary, with every passing day he makes them with
increasing frequency in spite of the fact that he spends almost all his free time
playing the instrument.
What happened? The answer is obvious – your child simply exhausted himself at the
very beginning of musical training, and now it will be difficult for him to stay
among the best students. He can be compared to a professional athlete who gave his
all at the start and consequently lost by the end of the game. It is the same with
children. Even if they continue receiving musical training, some remain “mediocrities”
among other students. But generally, they lose interest in music and find another
activity. And that is the best-case scenario. In the worst case the child’s fear
of having his abilities evaluated by the teacher can lead to depression and other
possible future problems that can stem from this experience.
There are a very small number of children who are simply born to be responsible for
everything that they do. Can you recall from your own experiences how often you now,
as parents, ask or asked the child in the past to do something (for example musical
training) and, for the lack of proper reaction and actions on the child’s part, had
to do it yourself? And do you know that some of us go too far and do this on a daily
basis? “Mom and Dad will do everything for you,” some of us say, turning these actions
into a habit.
Fortunately, it is impossible for Mom or Dad to prepare for